Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Bliss

Unbelievably it has been 3 months since Rowan's birth and my last post!  I cannot believe how quickly the time has flown.  I have thought many times, why didn't my pregnancy go this fast?!    While I have thought of many blog topics along the way (jaundice, bili-blanket, breast feeding, reflux, green poop, dairy allergy, delirium, and all the fun things new Mom's experience) I have resisted writing on those topics because when I think about the core message of this blog they just seem so trivial.  That being said, I figured a little update is certainly appropriate.

The only word I can use to describe the last 3 months is bliss, pure bliss!  Rowan has been a complete dream and is sleeping through the night, taking great naps, & eating well.   On top of those core necessities he is smiling, cooing, laughing & melting my heart on a daily basis.  I can truly say that I savor every second I am with him like the last bite of decadent chocolate cake or the scent of fresh roses.  I look at him and can't help but tear up because I just love him so much, he is so perfect.

Now, perfect (to me) he may be, but he is an infant.  He did have his middle of the night wake up calls, always just as I finally entered dream world.  Bags under my eyes & a slightly delirious state being my norm, I never did mind waking up with him because those were some of the sweetest moments in his first weeks of life.  In fact, Frank goes to work at 5 am so we had agreed that he would take the 4:30 am feeding which lasted no more than 2 mornings because I missed being with him during those wee hours.  And, now that he sleeps through the night I still sometimes miss those precious moments.

Rowan is a big spitter!  He has reflux & while he is not fussy or colicky he makes up for both in spit-up. The poor little guy literally spews up his lunch many, many times per feeding.  Sometimes it is just a little dribble and other times it is a full projectile waterfall, so we do many loads of laundry & I can now write a book on the best burp rags available.  It also turns out that Rowan is sensitive (well, allergic) to dairy, so no cheese, milk, butter, or anything fun for Mom.

Spit-up, evening wake-up calls, poopy diapers, a diet without cheesecake, none of it matters.  In fact, I love all of it because it has to do with him.  Maybe this attitude has come from the long journey I have been on or maybe I have a dose of happy hormones, but I think it comes from love.  I have truly never experienced love like this before & I can't possibly imagine experiencing it again.  I know I will with the birth of subsequent kids, but for now I am soaking in the rich bliss of Rowan!


Here are some recent pics from our trip to Hawaii last week:

















A pregnancy blog with a twist.

If you start from my first entry "The Beginning" you will hear about my life's tragedy.  Out of the ashes of this terrible experience I have formed a whole new outlook on pregnancy.  Throw away the pregnancy books, stop worrying and complaining about pregnancy symptoms, forget about the multi-billion dollar pregnancy & baby industry and simply enjoy the miracle of creating life.  I plan to write about this pregnancy process from a new perspective.  A wiser, more thankful, and hopefully not too jaded perspective.  Since I wouldn't wish my tragedy on my worst enemy I hope that women can learn from my experience and perhaps view their own pregnancies in a slightly different light.  Enjoy!  And, happy miracle making!