No matter what due date I pick from (first day last period, date of conception, first ultrasound measurement, most recent ultrasound measurement, etc.) Baby C is officially full term! It is an amazing feeling to have made it this far & to know that every additional day of pregnancy is just an added bonus. I actually commented to Frank that "this pregnancy has gone by so fast"! He almost fell out of his chair. That being said, I am SO ready to have this baby that these final days/weeks seem to drag on like months.
As of my appointment last Wednesday I am 4cm dilated and 75% effaced! Frank and I were convinced that Baby C would make it's grand entrance this past weekend, but here I am writing this blog entry on Monday. While I am ever grateful that we are at a point where we can wish for signs of labor, I find myself having a hard time with this dramatic paradigm shift. I spent the majority of this pregnancy preventing labor and here I am eating spicy food, going on hikes, taking baths & having Frank give me acupressure foot massages. Considering my fairly advanced cervical dilation with no signs of active labor, I sometimes wonder if I have been so mentally focused on preventing labor that my mind is actually preventing my body from going into labor?! I'm sure I am over thinking it all, and probably giving my mind over body control a little too much credit, but it is a bit coincidental that the woman who spent almost 2 months on bed rest & took a pre-term labor hormone for 13 weeks is now typing while bouncing on an exercise ball, hoping to induce labor.
While it is easy to get frustrated that the baby isn't cooperating with my desire to move from pregnancy into the next phase, I do remind myself that each day means stronger lung capacity, better sucking reflexes & a fatter, happier newborn. It is also a humble reminder that no matter how much we want things to happen a certain way, our body & mother nature truly know best & may have different plans. While knowing that almost all of the labor inducing tricks are mere wives tales I have still tried them all, to no avail. In fact, I have pretty much given up any hope of influencing when I will go into labor. So paradigm shift or not I have figured out that, like everything in life, our destiny lies in hands far greater than our own & baby will come when baby is ready.
A pregnancy blog with a twist.
If you start from my first entry "The Beginning" you will hear about my life's tragedy. Out of the ashes of this terrible experience I have formed a whole new outlook on pregnancy. Throw away the pregnancy books, stop worrying and complaining about pregnancy symptoms, forget about the multi-billion dollar pregnancy & baby industry and simply enjoy the miracle of creating life. I plan to write about this pregnancy process from a new perspective. A wiser, more thankful, and hopefully not too jaded perspective. Since I wouldn't wish my tragedy on my worst enemy I hope that women can learn from my experience and perhaps view their own pregnancies in a slightly different light. Enjoy! And, happy miracle making!